I was walking up to my favorite Dunkin’ Donuts when the voice in my head started in on me.
“Remember that dream you had the other night where you were running so fast that you were running in slow motion?”
“Yeah, what about it,” my curious side asked.
“Remember how good you felt when you were running so fast that you were running in slow motion. Remember how streamlined and how healthy you felt when you heard those ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch sounds in your head?”
“Yes,” I confessed. I didn’t want to pursue the conversation any longer because the fact that I was running in slow motion and hearing ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch sounds at 43 years old was a little disconcerting.
“You should skip the cookie today, just like you did yesterday.”
“But yesterday after skipping the cookie at Dunkin’ Donuts I ended up eating pistachios at my desk and they were really good,” I countered.
“You should skip the pistachios, too.”
“I want to ride my bike but it’s not bike riding season yet,” I silently remarked, using whatever telepathic means was necessary to shut the voice up inside my head. I don’t like it when that voice reminds me of ch-ch-ch-ch and healthy eating.
“Riding your bike will be much easier this spring if you watch what you eat during hibernation season.”
“I want to sleep if it’s hibernation season,” was my simple reply.
“You can’t. There’s too much to do. Why don’t you ride the exercise bike tonight as a way to celebrate the fact that you’re not going to order a cookie when you get to the counter?”
I was entering the front door of Dunkin’ Donuts when I muttered out loud, “Fine.” I wonder if people think I have tourettes.
I didn’t have to place an order for the unsweetened iced tea because the order was already in the process of being assembled. Yesterday I had encountered a new person behind the register and she asked what I wanted as the other person behind the counter handed me my already assembled beverage of choice.
“I’m predictable, I guess,” I remarked to the new person behind the register. Apparently this translated to “my UFO has cruise control” because she gave me a look like I was an alien.
I started my journey back to the Jeep to write this blog entry when the voice started up again.
“See, you did it, no cookie today. You’ll thank me for it later on.”
I better find a way to make the ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch sound.
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